Girly Girl by Author Kristin Billerbeck

Another Madonna "Documentary"

Here's Madonna, dressed as Marlene Dietrich, for the premiere of her latest documentary about her tour. Is it 1984 in here? Or is it just me?

This inspires me. I'd love to do a "Waiting for Guffman" mockumentary on Madonna's Middle-Aged tour -- I mean, MDNA tour. THAT would be interesting. Who sees these documentaries? Does Madonna ever let you see the REAL her? Is there an authentic her? Or is she just all fluff and cone bras. I'd like to see her children interviewed. Her exes. Don't get me wrong, I'd give her a chance to state her piece. But a real documentary tells ALL sides of the story. It isn't micromanaged to make the subject look infallible.

My Office is Moving...Uniforms -- YAY!

The office I'm working in is moving and we had our choice between scrubs (is anyone else hearing that song No Scrubs?) Or LuluLemon Yoga Pants with a uniformed shirt. Ding, ding, ding!

I love my Yoga pants. They're so comfortable! Of course, I'll have to go back to Yoga to look decent in them, but at least I'll be comfortable. That definitely beats dressing up everyday, don't you think?

Ours won't have a stripe, of course. But I am liking the idea. Although I may miss the heels after awhile. My calves are shaping up! Guess I'll have to get that through Yoga.

Oh and on a writing note, I'm writing in my off-time. I'm going to try and do a new Ashley chapter per week at least!

Selena And Ed Sheeran

Just got an email from Us Weekly that Ed Sheeran and Selena Gomez are "hooking up." I don't know what upsets me more. The fact that I'm on the receiving end of an email like that (as if it is newsworthy) or the thought of either of those two in that context.

Sources say they were set up by Taylor Swift. Red Flag! Although if Taylor doesn't want him, there's a good chance he's emotionally-healthy.

Sources also say that Ed is sweet, sensitive and a lot deeper than Justin Bieber. File that under Duh!

Melissa Etheridge Should Mind Her Own Business

I really can't abide Melissa Etheridge. She sounds like an absolutely horrible person. Gets married to her gay partner, has kids, then tries to destroy her partner and not pay a thing for her child.

This, to me, is who the woman is. If you know differently, I'm willing to be enlightened, but I just think she's a textbook narcissist who doesn't think she should have any consequences for her actions. (My favorite kind of person!)

So she's a breast cancer survivor and basically saying that Angelina Jolie's mastectomy was fearful. Not brave.

Shut up.

If you haven't had multiple relatives die of that disease like someone with the BRCA1 gene has, you need to just shut up and be grateful you're alive after your battle. Really, you just need to mind your own business. You may your choice, she made hers. Who are you to judge her decision?

I just love how she thinks she should be allowed to do whatever she wants, say whatever she wants without judgement, but still has the right to judge others. You can't have it both ways lady, so shut it!

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-207_162-57589777/melissa-etheridge-angelina-jolies-mastectomy-decision-was-fearful-not-brave/

And now to purge my system after that pic.

There are no words for John Mayer's New Video Paper Dolls

 

This is supposedly John Mayer's answer to Taylor Swift's "Dear John" song. I hate that I like John Mayer. He seems like such a dog, but I can't help myself. He really is talented and full of soul.

And Joanna Rohrback...I'm convinced there's something about Pancercisizing that is hypnotically-addictive. Try and look away! What the heck is that? What does she sprinkle on us?

No #Bachelorette Tonight For Me

I got home from work to a DVR fail. So I'll have to wait until it's streamed. Did you all enjoy it? Is it worth watching?

Nigella Lawson's Husband Defends Himself...

Seriously, there is NO defense against putting your hands on a woman. I don't care how much this guy is worth, he is not a man. He is a petty, small, little wimp!

The fact that he bothers to defend himself tells you everything you need to know about this jerk. He is not sorry. He feels no empathy for his wife, and he obviously feels entitled. He called it a "playful row" -- wow, he must be a barrel of laughs at home!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2342922/Nigella-Lawson-Charles-Saatchi-says-row-playful-tiff-held-throat-emphasise-point.html

Writing Again...

I'm happy to state that I've sent off a proposal for a new series. It's going to be a young adult series and different from my normal stuff, so I may publish it under a pseudonym.

I just heard my agent is doing very poorly on the health front and he's been evacuated because of the Colorado fires. It's just so tragic. I am grateful to understand that this is not the end and that love lasts through the ages, regardless of our time here on earth. So make it count!

I wanted to write a Supernatural story for the Christian market and "The Awakening" as its tentatively called, follows a pair of high school students, charged with binding a demon that has been unleashed on their small town in the California redwoods. The above is the model I've used for their high school. I'll keep you posted. Go make today matter and tell someone you love them!!

(Oh and FYI, I'm working late at my other job, so "The Bachelorette" recap will be late for those of you who care!)

Tom Hanks' Mansion For Sale

By LA standards, it's a very simple home and it's going for sale for only $5.25 million -- which for California is quite reasonable. But honestly, the outside is gorgeous. See ALL the pics here:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2342862/Tom-Hanks-puts-Los-Angeles-marital-mansion-Rita-Wilson-market-5-25m.html

But could you live in a house this void of color? To me, it would be like living in a cave. It looks like the house was never finished.

Not ONE room in the pictures is a different color. Maybe this is just staged and they didn't live in it like this. I hope. Because how can you live in a house that beautiful, but that bland? Makes me itch.

Real Housewives Hawking Stuff #RHONJ

We're used to Real Housewives trying to extend their fifteen minutes of fame and expand "their brand" -- as if adult women catfighting is a brand, but I digress. These shows are turning into one bad commercial.

The Real Housewives have given us the following:

New York:
Suck-it-up Knickers & a book from Jill Zarin
Skinny Girl Margarita by Bethanny
Pinot Grigio + Religious Jewelry by Ramona
The Countess' (ahem) music

New Jersey:
Theresa's cookbooks & Faballinis (sp?)
Melissa's singing
Manzo Black Water (I still don't know what that is)

OC:
Wines by Wives
Gretchen Christine trailer park accessories & handbags
Vicki's Vodka

I'm sure there's many more, but the one that sends me over the edge? This Real Housewives of New Jersey storyline with Jacqueline Laurita and her autistic son. I've been around autism my entire life. It's my brother's diagnosis and I worked in the summers at his school. My own son was diagnosed with Aspergers and I did all the treatments available at Stanford so that he is a normal kid (well, as normal as you get in this family) so when I see Jacqueline pushing this "Hyperbaric Chamber" therapy for her son's autism. This isn't just some cheap handbag that isn't hurting anyone.

Now I'm sure she's a good mother, and I know understand the desperation of feeling your child may not have a normal life. But that chamber isn't going to do squat. And I hate to think that someone might be influenced by false hopes. That they think they need this to get their child to a better diagnosis.

I was very lucky to live right next to Stanford and have the best insurance for my son when he was young. Many parents don't have this option and I just don't want to see this kind of snake oil make a parent feel hopeless.

I imagine she's getting all these therapies for free so that they get screen time. I hope that isn't true and I'm just cynical. A home hyperbaric chamber is supposedly $10k to $18k according to Jenny McCarthy.