I'm officially over the housewives, I think. NYC got new housewives and they got rid of my favorite, Jill Zarin. They have an author now, who has outed the rest of us by being socially inept. Get back in the closet, girl! Don't let them know our secret!!
Aviva is definitely the best new addition. She is the mother of four, divorced from a dog of a human (at least he sounds that way as he's besties with Sonja.) Aviva has a prosthetic leg and expects the pedi place to do three feet for the price of two. "Do you think they're going to charge me more?" Um, do you think you should maybe PAY more? I mean, the woman getting out 3 lbs via liposuction is going to pay the same as the woman who has to get fifty sucked out. Just saying.
Carolyne is the author. We know this because she has said "NYT Bestselling Author" just a time or two. Or eighteen. She also name drops that she used to work for Peter Jennings as a journalist and we see her go to Glamour? Elle? I forget which, to write a heart-pumping story on the Kardashians. She's a widow and we're going to get to see her date, but like I said, she's a writer and socially-inept, so this may get good.
Heather is the fashion designer with the shapewear line obviously sent to give a middle finger to Jill Zarin. Jill seriously must have ticked Andy Cohen off. I can't remember an interesting thing about Heather.
Ramona & the Countess. Why? Why are these two of all of them back? Ramona is addicted to Adderall. I've seen what happens when you're on it and you're not ADD, and that's my theory. Then, she sucks down wine like a fiend to counteract her racing heart. She is a hot mess and her dinner party where she and Mario give etiquette lessons is classic.
The Countess is trying to convince us that Ramona blackmailed her. The thing is, I totally believe her, but Ramona will have forgotten all about it and therefore, in her mind it is not true.
Then, there's Sonja. Sonja is very in touch with her sensual side. She therefore acts like Cloris Leachman in a Girls Gone Wild video. Seriously, what grown adult acts like her?
I think I'm over this one. Did you watch?