Ryan Lochte is an Olympic gold medalist. I think he won five, but don't quote me because I'm a sports idiot.
Anyhoo, Ryan's mother said that he goes out on one night stands. Mortified, Ryan tried to explain that she meant dates. Dates, Mom. I go out on dates. Not one night stands! But he did so in a way that was honoring to his mother and didn't make her look like she was drumming up business for her son's one night stands.
On the contrary, Mom was trying to say that he was trying to be respectful to women and didn't have time for a relationship. At least that is Ryan's story.
At this point, Ryan is saying, "MOM, STOP TALKING. JUST STOP TALKING!"
However, if one thought that Ryan only had to overcome his media unsavvy mother, you didn't see his interview tonight with Piers Morgan. I happened to see it because Utah rolls up the streets at 8 p.m. and though they have about one hundred Mexican restaurants, there is not a margarita to be found.
I'd make a terrible Mormon. They don't drink coffee either. Seriously, combine that with the special underwear and their soft-spoken natures, and I'm out.
Back to Ryan. Ryan was interviewed alongside his father. I don't know if his Mom and Dad are divorced, but all I can say is...wow. That kid overcame a LOT to become an Olympic champion and most likely he was swimming away from all the chattering. His dad did not SHUT UP during the whole interview, and it was ALL about dad. Not the actual gold medalist we'd like to hear interviewed.
And it was Ryan's birthday too. I mean, if Dad doesn't give you the podium after five medals AND it's your birthday? Dude, RUN! Now Ryan seems like he's spent a bit more time in the water than say, a library, but as cute as he is, girls be warned. This family is slightly off their rocker.
Oh and Piers Morgan put Ryan's grill in his mouth. GROSS. Like that was all the poor guy needed to top his birthday. Some stranger's saliva on his grill.