Instead, it's getting angry? Doesn't sound very Christian, I suppose, but I'd go along with this because forgiveness is not ignoring a slight. I think talking about troubles helps you work through them, ignoring the and calling that forgiveness? Not so much.
Anger is a genuine emotion and if Jesus was entitled to have some anger, what hope is there for the rest of us to take on a Zen attitude when we've been wronged? Forgiveness should come after someone is sorry. Not before. Otherwise, repeat this with me, "I'm a doormat!"
You can genuinely forgive someone who has wronged you for your own health, but I contend that you can't live with them if they don't care to make things right. What say you?
I could see that it becomes another argument. If you say you forgive someone without dealing with the issue, so the next time your mad about two things. And they're mad because you SAID you forgave them.
I'm not sure anger is the right expression as much as dealing with the issue head on.
Posted by: Lauri | August 03, 2012 at 08:45 AM
I was talking a friend who was a family therapist. There were a few time he provoked his clients to anger simply because it was a healthy was of getting everything out in the open and helped take the sting out of some of the wrong that was happening. I did think this article was a bit one sided. If you can't forgive someone after you have expressed anger at them, there is no way the marriage will survive.
Posted by: Tony | August 03, 2012 at 11:36 AM
Communication has to be safe.
Sent from my iPhone
Posted by: Kristin Billerbeck | August 03, 2012 at 11:38 AM