Bachelor Sean Gets A Book Cover...
Boots baby!

#Vanderpump Rules is everything that's right with Reality TV and wrong with the World.

Bravo TV's new show gave us an hour of SUNSCREENGATE tonight. Literally, an hour of drama and profanity-laced rants about someone putting sunscreen on someone else's boyfriend.

The thing I love about all of these shows is armchair-diagnosing the various personality disorders that are apparent on my TV screen. Scheana is the girl who was having an affair with Brandi Glanville's husband who ISN'T Leanne Rimes. The show started with Brandi confronting Scheana and truly, it was sad. Brandi still doesn't seem to get that Eddie Cibrian was no catch and that someone else isn't responsible for his reprehensible actions.

But back to Sunscreengate. So our resident crazy on the show, Stassi -- I'm going to armchair-diagnose her with Borderline Personality Disorder, has spent the entire first show worrying Scheana has some kind of magical ability over men to render them powerless. Stassi spent the entire second hour worrying Scheana is after her man, Jax. Really Jax is just looking for peace. He actually slept in his car just to get away from Stassi's crazy ranting.

She thinks that's crazy. Of course she does.

All I can say is, thank you Bravo. After two days of plumbing woes and not a minute to myself, I'm grateful that there is braindead entertainment that makes me feel better about myself. I may not be a gorgeous 23-year old waiting tables in a scarf. But that's just it. I'm not waiting tables in a scarf. And today, that's something. My scarf is actually an accessory, not an outfit. Sometimes, you gotta look at the bright side.