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July 2014
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September 2014

Austenland -- for real!

Nicki spent the day in Austenland this week. Lovely Australia has a day to celebrate all things Pemberley and she and her friend went all dressed up in their lovely Georgian gear.

I'm not sharing any of her private photos because I don't want her to cross the pond and hurt me, but where is this ode to literature in America?



Elle told me it was ComicCon for Austen nerds. Which is fine by me, and rendered Nicki non-plussed because we'd rather be Austen nerds than the alternative.

Oz is so much more committed to the arts than America. People who are surgeons by day may perform in the local theater at night. I think that makes them more well-rounded, and perhaps my English family went to the wrong shores. Or my Irish family. Somebody must have taken the wrong turn. How did I end up in Silicon Valley with the math nerds?

You will all be happy to know I'm making a big change that will enable me to get back to writing, and functioning as an arteest again. Granted, perhaps I will never be Austen, but I do have a little of her snark, and I am ready to get back to it! Okay, and just for fun...


Ant Man --The Movie

There's a new movie coming out called "Ant Man" This is the promo shot for it:


It stars Paul Rudd (Role Models --my favorite Paul Rudd movie) But there's only one Ant Man!


How Writers Vent

Last night, I'm innocently watching television when this text comes into a few of us writers who use each other to vent. It reads:

"Why do I write romance? There's only so many ways to write a kissing scene without it sounding porny."

The other writer on the loop writes back,"Have you tried 'suck face' that's new."

This is just one of the reasons we're home alone on Saturday Night.

Taylor Swift

I know this basically makes me a 13-year old girl, but I just love Taylor Swift's new song, "Shake it Off." I love its message. I hope it inspires many girls out there to know they are enough and what people say about them does not make it truth!


There's one part that's a little questionable, so you've been warned, but I think the video is darling.

The Straw Police

Yesterday, I had oral surgery and I spent most of the day drugged up in la-la land. Drugs and me do not agree -- but from the sound of it, I'm a happy drunk. With the exception of one thing: The Straw Police.

My son drove me to the surgeon. Apparently, they told me that I was not to drink from a straw. What subhuman rule is this? I don't remember any such rule, but I'd told Jonah, "When I'm done, drive directly to Starbucks." (I hadn't eaten, which isn't important. I hadn't had coffee!)

So we get to Starbucks, though in all honesty, I don't remember going to Starbucks, and I don't know how I got a soy mocha in my hand, but I did. I promptly get my drink and shove a straw into the cup.

Jonah says, "Nooo." Like I'm a toddler, and pulls the straw out.
I give him the look like he's just murdered my soul.
"You can't drink from a straw. Don't you remember that?"
"I want a straw!"
"No," he says patiently, and pulls it away.


He decides he's hungry. I am too, apparently. So he gets us McDonald's. I grab my drink and insert a straw.

"No," he says again. I pout like a child.

I slept the afternoon away and then, it was nighttime, and someone brought me a milkshake for dinner. My eyes are wide, and I start to drink, when OUT OF NOWHERE, Jonah swoops in from another room and steals the straw! Are you kidding me??

"I thought you were at work!" I tell him.

"I got off early."

"To destroy my life?"

I'm not sure how long this straw rule lasts. I only know they may as well have told me that I cannot eat using my hands for a week.

Don't you see that the straw is part of the experience?


Brad & Angelina Got Married!

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie Reuters 660

I really hope they sold the wedding pics because I am dying to see her dress. I just think she's so beautiful and I'm sure she looked incredible in the gown. And you know, he's not exactly hard on the eyes. I wonder if all their kidlets dressed up too?

I'm glad they did it quietly though. These two really seem to maintain their privacy for how famous they both are.

Favorite Book to Movie?

Someone asked this on Facebook, and it's a great question. What's your favorite adaptation from book to movie? Your least favorite?

My favorites:


1. The Thorn Birds (though it's a different story than the book to me -- love both!)


2. Bridget Jones's Diary


3. Gone with the Wind (but I didn't like the book, so does that count?)


4. Phantom of the Opera

BBC Adaptations (they count, right?)


5. Pride & Prejudice (can I get a hearty DUH?)

Persuasion ciaran hinds wentworth

6. Persuasion (Ciaran Hinds' version)


7. Madame Bovary
8. The Forsyte Saga


Least Favorites:
1. The Accidental Tourist (Macon Leary is a jerk, not a bumbling innocent!)
2. Anna Karenina (I have yet to see justice done to this story on screen)

So what are your favorites? Least favorites?

"Me" Boards

This a.m. while driving my son to school, I saw this poor girl carrying her "me" board. That's what you do at the beginning of school to describe yourself in a few adjectives and let the teacher know who you are. Plus, it builds on the narcissism that is already so prevalent in Silicon Valley.


As we were driving this girl's "Me" board was visible while I waited at the stop sign. It said:


And I said to my son, "Oh poor girl is going to be a writer. She should just give up now."

Silicon Valley values that kind of brain as much as they do a snail. No, wait. The snail is a product of evolution, so we don't want to minimize the importance of the snail. Plus, you can eat a snail in a French Restaurant. What can you do with another writer?

So mean!

My kids are so mean to me. I lost a bunch of weight, so I was showing my son, yanking at the waistband of my jeans. "Look how loose my jeans are! I'm totally rocking 'em!"

And he goes, "That's because you're wearing mine!"

"I am?"

I turn around check out my bum. I'm totally wearing my own jeans. He starts completely laughing that I fell for it.

How is that funny? The proper reaction is, "Great job, Mom! Way to get your yoga on!"


Chaos Reigns #Bachelor in Paradise to the rescue!

What a week. Seriously. I am going to write no matter what happens. That's what I said this week, and not one word edited, and it's Wednesday!

I did sit down to watch "Bachelor in Paradise" last night because it always makes me feel better about myself that others pull their crazy crap with an audience. At least mine is private. I think.


Clare proved a wee bit unstable last night, as she woke Zach up from a deep, snoring sleep (and seriously girls, that is a no-brainer -- you are never sleeping again with a guy who snores that loudly!) to tell him she's leaving. Why she couldn't wait until the morning, we'll never know. But maybe the raccoon will give up his secrets one day.


And by the way, if they're in paradise? That raccoon must not think so because is the scruffiest-looking raccoon I ever saw.

Meanwhile, Cody and Michelle Money win as the most awkward couple and proof that beer goggles exist. Not that either one of them is unattractive, but would they approach each other if they weren't the only ones without a date on warped Gilligan's island? Probably not. Cody starts painting her toenails. I think about how I need a pedi and a life for watching this trash.

Then, they go on a date, and dress up like they're getting married for a photo shoot. Michelle hyperventilates about how she's done this before, and "this is serious." While we're all at home thinking, no it's not. It's a modeling gig. Just get dressed already.


One thing I'll say. Watching this show makes me want to stop before every decision I make, and over-dramatize it for the cameras. You know, so you get how important that I am.

Lucy whirls in with her "free-spirit" read: Nutbag. She thinks she's on an episode of "Naked and Dating" but after stripping off and walking around the entire "paradise" so everyone could get a good look, she gets dressed and goes on a date. With Jesse -- which leaves Christy crying in her beer.

I'm not sure why anyone makes a choice to go on this show, but after a long day yesterday, I'm kind of glad they do.