I watched "Room" so you don't have to...
Irony

#TheBachelor Fail

First, mine.  I didn't blog while watching because -- get this, I was being domestic and baking cookies.  FYI, if you make these with gluten-free oatmeal and Peanut Butter, they are the bomb.  I so miss Paula Deen and her weekly ode to butter. Paula Deen's Monster Cookies

Back to the current scandal -- Ben told two women he loved them.  Like, how does it not dawn on Ben at this point that he can't have two wives?  Or that it's going to make it harder on the wife-in-waiting when he lets her know she's not the one?  Steve Harvey will have nothing on Ben soon.  This bachelor is going to go from beloved to vile very quickly.  I'd feel for him if he wasn't utterly ridiculous.  Going to the fantasy suite with Caila, even if nothing happened, is cruel and utterly tacky.  He didn't know BEFORE he couldn't tell the one chick that he didn't love her?  

And what about the other two?  If I was engaged to this loser and saw that?  I'd be questioning my/his choice.  BTW, did y'all catch the Scripture verse tatted on his waist?  Yeah, I'm sure you did because he was naked with three women on last night's show.  Not like we could have missed it.  Wouldn't it have been great if the words started sizzling?  Just sayin' 

JAMAICA

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Okay, let's get into the dates.  Ben and Caila go on a jungle book cruise -- and it's gorgeous, and so romantic.  Only it's not.  Because this is awkward. Not that this stops Ben from saying what he has to say to get Caila into the fantasy suite.  Nah.  Mr. Innocence has all the right words for that.  Caila is such a beauty with the most gorgeous hair, but -- she seems like a trophy wife to me.  She's not about anything yet.  She just wants to be the wife, and Ben doesn't seem like he'd need that kind of girl.  Maybe it's me, but I'm hopeful she's not the Bachelorette.  At the same time, she deserves it after being dumped before the rose ceremony when she "surprised" Ben at his place.  The producers must have loved that.

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Lauren B gets the date of the night, with the release of baby sea turtles. "Lauren and I are helping turtles survive and that's a very important thing."  Thank you, Ben.  For that fascinating narration.  In a wonderful twist of fate, Ben gets pinched by a baby crab sent by Caila.  Ben goes on to tell Lauren that he loves her -- about six times.  (He wants to be thorough in case she's considering backing out of the fantasy suite, I'm guessing.)

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Finally, there's the date with JoJo in an idyllic waterfall setting. Now, JoJo is gorgeous, but she is wearing a HIDEOUS bikini.  Hideous.  Not that Ben minds, because as I just stated, JoJo was in a bikini.  He tells her that he loves her too, and to heck with the rules.  Um, the ONE rule that is in place for a reason.  You are not to tell the Bachelorettes you love them. Ben, did we mention there's one rule?  Just one.  Don't tell the girls you love them.  Carry on.  

I think the best part of the night is Chris Harrison's face when BOTH JoJo and Lauren giddily tell him that Ben told them he loved them.  Then, they have this ridiculous ROSE CEREMONY with two roses and two women.  And to think, Chris wasn't even around to say, "Ladies, the final rose."  I think because he knows he needs to get as far away from the future fallout as possible.  Hands up, "I had nothing to do with this!"

JoJo gives Lauren some serious side eye after the roses are handed out.  I liked all three girls left.  None of them deserve what this dbag is about to do to them.  Even whomever he "picked."  Because I'll you what.  If some guy asked me to marry him, and two nights before he was with two other women?  He can take a long hike off a short pier.  I don't have high hopes for this one ending up in a marriage after the "winner" sees the final episodes.  

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For once, I'm really looking forward to "The Women Tell All." I still wish they'd have a Bachelorette of interest.  My vote is still for Jubilee.

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